#1 The Gift
#2 The Shroud of Wally
#3 Art
#4 The Trial
#5 The Dupey
#6 The Security Guard
 		#7 The Merger
#8 Hunger
#9 The Off-Site Meeting
#10 The Assistant
#11 The Return
#12 The Virtual Employee
 		#13 The Pregnancy
#14 The Delivery
#15 Company Picnic
#16 The Fact
#17 Ethics

Executive producer Scott Adams, Co-executive producers David Silverman & Stephen Sustarsic, Supervising producer Richard Raynis, Produced by Jeffrey Goldstein, Producer Kara Vallow, Supervising director Seth Kearsley

#1 The Gift: Aired Tuesday, November 2, 1999

Dilbert has to find a birthday gift for his mother, and is afraid to go to the mall because that is where he lost his dad. Dilbert finally goes to the mall with his co-workers, and finds his dad still at the all-you-can-eat buffet. Alice tries out a new device that shows how excited she gets shopping. Dogbert catapults people off the escalator. The boss ruins movies for everyone by telling them the endings. Guest voices of Buck Henry and Jeri Ryan.

top
#2 The Shroud of Wally: Aired Tuesday, November 9, 1999

Wally becomes a spiritual guru after the company wins a NASA contract and launches a rocket for space exploration.

top
#3 Art: Aired Tuesday, November 16, 1999

Dilbert creates a new art craze of a blue duck that sweeps the world, until Leonardo Da Vinci, the head of the organized art families, decrees it uncool.

top
#4 The Trial: Aired Tuesday, November 23, 1999

Dilbert is convicted of murder after the boss causes an accident that kills a busload of Nobel Prize winners. He reforms death row before Dogbert gets the supreme court to pardon him to improve book sales. Alice marries death row inmates just before they die.

top
#5 The Dupey: Aired Tuesday, December 7, 1999

Dogbert run seminars for baby assertiveness. When the cute high-demand fuzzy toys designed by Dilbert evolve into ugly higher life forms, his Boss hatches an evil plot to turn them into pizza toppings. When that fails, he sends them to the land-fill to be pecked to death by seagulls. Dilbert, with help from the garbage man, Dogbert and the babies, tries to save the dupeys, but they cannot re-enter society, so they leave the planet... and end up at Apple Computers.

top
#6 The Security Guard: Aired Tuesday, January 18, 2000

Dilbert exchanges jobs with a security guard, presiding over a casino-style office overrun by 12-year-olds.

top
#7 The Merger: Aired Tuesday, January 25, 2000

Dilbert's company tries to merge with a brain-sucking alien organization. Wally taunts the administrative employees who will probably be fired after the merger, until Catbert demotes Wally to the administrative position of door-watching troll. Alice is scared of synergy. Loud Harold gets put in a closet so that he doesn't scare off the merging company. Dilbert takes the brain sucking alien CEO to marketing, where he tries to suck marketing brains, and starves to death with a full stomach. The aliens decide not to colonize earth after all. Dogbert founds an investment banking firm, get an enormous amount of money from Dilbert's company even though the merger fall through, and buys the brain sucking company for himself.

top
#8 Hunger: Aired Tuesday, February 1, 2000

Dilbert, while helping to support a starving child in Elbonia with 87 cents a week, invents the tomeato, a new food that should cure hunger. His company decides to plant it in Elbonia, where the tomeato ruins the tasty mud, and no one will eat the nasty new food. Dilbert meets the child he's been supporting, who's actually a millionaire, and Wally convinces him to build houses with the tomeato, but they end up exploding from the combo of rotting meat and fertilizer. So Elbonia makes bombs out of the tomeato, which devastates Dilbert. He goes back to Elbonia to try to convince the people not to use the tomeato as a weapon, but only his mother can make the Elbonias actually eat the tomeato, and even makes their icky mud tasty again.

top
#9 The Off-Site Meeting: Aired Tuesday, February 8, 2000

Dilbert regrets inviting his co-workers to his house for an off-site meeting when a neighbor's elephant destroys his yard.

Rating: 1.3

top
#10 The Assistant: Aired Tuesday, February 15, 2000

The Boss tries to improve morale by promoting Dilbert to management and giving him an assistant. Alice retaliates by making Ashuk her assistant.

top
#11 The Return: Aired Tuesday, February 22, 2000

Dilbert orders a top of the line computer online, but gets an old model he doesn't want. He can't find a real person to complain to, so he finally tracks down an address and goes to return the computer in person. He meets the great Comp-U-Comp, a computer that controls the world and won't take back Dilbert's reject. Comp-U-Comp claims to be a superior being, so Dilbert challenges him to prove it. They decide to play best two out of three, chess, badminton and Scrabble. Comp-U-Comp easily wins chess, but Dilbert manages to best the legless and armless computer at badminton. Just as Dilbert is losing miserably in Scrabble because Comp-U-Comp is inserting new words into the dictionary, Dogbert gets the plug guard to drink one too many sodas, and when the guard goes to the bathroom Dogbert unplugs Comp-U-Comp.

top
#12 The Virtual Employee: Aired Tuesday, May 30, 2000

Dilbert is sick of all the obsolete equipment piling up in his cubicle, so with help from his friends at work he finds an empty cubicle, makes up an employee named Todd who works there, and stores all his old stuff there. Unfortunately, news of Todd makes it to the boss and Catbert, the evil director of human resources, and Todd gets promoted while Wally gets fired. Todd becomes a God figure, with people believing in him on faith alone. The boss overhears Dilbert and his friends plotting to kill Todd, since they realize they've created a monster. They are arrested for Todd's murder, but Dogbert instructs Wally to call the police and say that he is Todd and is away on a secret government mission.

top
#13 The Pregnancy: Aired Tuesday, June 6, 2000

Dilbert creates a small space rocket programmed to collect alien life and then return to Dilbert. It collects alien seed, bovine seed, hilbilly seed, robot seed, sperm from 12 engineers, and then returns to Dilbert, impregnating him. While Dilbert is unconscious in the hospital from the attack of the rocket, Dilmom and Dogbert tell the doctors to give him female hormones since Dilmom thinks this will be her only chance to have a grandchild. Dilbert slowly turns into a woman without realizing it, and then Dogbert finally tells him what's going on. Dilbert's company has a new HMO based in an Italian restaurant, and when they do an ultrasound, which involves a waiter making pinging noises on Dilbert's belly and a busboy drawing what he hears, Dilbert is horrified by the results.

top
#14 The Delivery: Aired Tuesday, June 13, 2000

After accepting the fact that he's pregnant, Dilbert is shocked to discover his company does not allow maternity leave. Fearful he might lose his job, Dilbert launches a media blitz to make extra cash. Unfortunately, drawing attention to his condition brings out the possible genetic parents of the fetus (cow, billionaire, aliens, hillbillies, robot, and engineers) to sue for custody. Dilbert loses the custody battle, and runs away. He goes into premature labor due to the stress, and gives birth to a being that is a perfect combination of all its many parents. As the genetic parents are about to lay claim, Dogbert rockets the baby off to Krypton, where Superman's parents are still living happily but childless.

top
#15 Company Picnic: Aired Tuesday, July 11, 2000

In the history of the company the engineers have only beat the marketing department at softball during the annual company picnic once: when they riggged the electronic scoreboard. Dogbert tries to coach the engineers to get hit by the ball and get a free walk to first base. Dilbert meets a cute new girl named Juliet from the marketing department, but their two departments won't let them be together. Dogbert makes an ass out of Dilbert by encouraging him to wear women's work-out clothes to the softball game. Juliet is working second base, so when the marketing department collapses from food poisoning because the boss got really cheap hotdogs, Dilbert takes the opportunity to steal second base to be with Juliet. He is concerned when she drops from food poisoning as well, and so eats some of a hotdog so that he can accompany her to the hospital, but it turns out she was just kidding.

top
#16 The Fact: Aired Tuesday, July 18, 2000

Dilbert creates Chronic Cubicle Syndrome, and manages to convince everyone that they have it. Dilbert is given the job to concoct a cure, and even though he doesn't believe that the syndrome exists, he creates shock pants that shock people when they slouch to combat CCS. The marketing department markets the shock pants, with the voltage turned up, as devices for bosses to control employees, and when people start dying the blame is placed on Dilbert. To get himself out of hot water, Dilbert proves that CCS doesn't exist and re-markets the pants, at a lower voltage, to angry wives, teachers, and amusement parks.

top
#17 Ethics: Aired Tuesday, July 25, 2000

Dilbert becomes project manager of the internet voting system, and suddenly all the special interest groups are trying to bribe him. The tobacco lobbyists even send a beautiful woman to his home, and he's tempted for a moment, but he stands strong by his democratic ethics.

top